Fiddles and beer

Homeless guy to his buddys: There's a difference between a violin and a fiddle; you can't spill a beer in a violin.

- SW 6th and Yamhill
-- Overheard by Rich

Blood-borne diseases? Please!

Two women who don't know each other.

Woman 1: (looking at the Woman 2's nose peircing) Did you do that yourself?
Woman 2: Yeah (goes on to explain how it's painless, and she's done it for family)
Woman 1: Could you do mine?
Woman 2: Sure!
Woman 1: What's your number?
Woman 2: (shouts number while getting off bus)

- #4 bus
-- Overheard by Tabitha

This might burn a little

Customer: How hot is your mild?
Thai Cart Owner: Medium spicy.
Customer: Ok, I'd like mine medium-hot.

- At the 4th and Alder food carts
-- Overheard by John

Dog stare

My dog and another dog met, sniffed, and then the other dog got a bit growly.

Woman to small dog who was growling at my dog: I know you don't like a direct stare, but you can always break it...

- Submitted by Erin

Birthday

Location: Summerlake Park, Family of three walking through park

Dad to little girl: Bethany! We should have your birthday here this year!
Mom, quietly to Dad: I thought we weren’t doing a birthday this year.

- Overheard by Kyle

Oddly amusing

Two guys smoking: That dude is a hardcore Facebooker.

- At Buffalo Gap
-- Overheare by Eric

Mastication Imagination

Loud, Drunk Guy talking to friend: I love mahi-mahi. I've been breaking down fish since I was 7 years old. Really, over the years, I've broken down just about every type of animal on the planet. ...except a human...if you think about it though, humans don't taste very good; that's why sharks spit us out. Babies, however, are delicious. [awkward pause throughout the bus] ....I'd imagine.


- On the late night #14, by 50th & Powell
-- Overheard by Ansel

Foot rapist

"He didn't RAPE her or anything, he just took her socks off while she slept 'cos he has a foot fetish!"

- Outside In clinic
-- Overheard by Nicole

American Idol

Apparently-scandalized dishwasher, to badly-singing cook: There are people out there eating!

- Utopia Cafe
-- Overheard by the woman at the counter

Library

Man apologizing for his public arrest, occurring the previous week at the same library: Being drunk does nobody no good. At least, being drunk in the library does nobody no good.

- NW Library
-- Overheard by Emily